Heaven & Hell

Monday, 9/3/07. 3 Days delay

I notice all my tongue sores, chemo & herpes, seem to be all better. Do I dare? I pop a cherry tomato in my mouth. Nuthin! No burning and I can use my tongue fully I squeal with delight. I still can't use my left side due to my temp root canal but I ask Dani to add a Brandywine to my plate. Sausage, steak fries, sliced brandywine with salt. I gleefully take a bite and do a little jig in my chair. Tomatoe. Salt. Gifts of the Gods. I'm so happy. I do my little jig each time I bite into my tomato. I'm almost me again. But not quite. Tomorrow's labs will determine that.

Tuesday, 9/4/07. 4th day

I go into Lombardi around 2PM. I was stalling. Afraid of the outcome. For some reason the phlebotomist can no longer hit my veins. Takes him two sticks near my knuckles. Again, like I'm some frikken Junkie. I go home and wait. I call at 4. One to the Research RN then One to my Docs RN.

WBC 4.9
ANC 3100

Back to normal. Can you believe that? ANC almost quadrupled in 4 days after struggling so long. I "get" chemo on Wednesday.

back home and I'm ecstatic. I have a drink or two. Happier than I can remember. Dani comes home and is quite shocked at my disposition. For dinner I have a porter house, corn on the cob, and another brandywine. So beautiful to be able to eat again. I do my little jig for every bite of corn and tomato I take. Dani's a little saddened by this. She got an almost completely happy Phil yesterday and a 100% happy Phil today.

Tomorrow, I will go away. Breaks Her heart. Makes me sad. So I say lets drink. Toast today. Tomorrow is not here. And drink we do.

Wednesday, 9/5/07. 5 days late

In for chemo at 0930. Out at 4PM. It goes off mostly without a hitch. And unpleasant Phil is back. Irritated Phil is back. Irritated while driving. Irritated at Whole Foods. Nauseated Phil is back. No appetite and I struggle to keep my food going the right way. Fucking meds don't do much but keep me from vomiting. yay. Irritated, sick, fatigued. Oh well. Such is life, eh?

Give Dani a hug. She needs it more than I.

Peace.