Sunday, August 19, 2007

Chemo with a Celebrity/Less Toxic My Ass [C]

1030 PM. Sunday. I just popped 0.5mg Lorazepam and washed it down with whiskey. It's my first drink since chemo. So hoping to sleep. So sure I won't. Soon I get a Compazine. Valley of the Guys...

No Corn
No Scones
No Toast
No Tomatoes
No Spice

Insomnia
Irritability
Gas
Anger
Nausea
Inner tremor, right foot
No Appetite
Anxiety
Constipation
High Blood Pressure
Chemo Brain
Fatigue
Mouth Sores


FRIDAY, 8/17/07
We Get to the Clinic and they put us in a room with another dude. He will be the first of two we share the room with. Both have it "easier" then me, in terms of time spent. I will be there from 0930-1600. Takes about 2hrs to make my drugs then 4 to deliver.

Phil's Cocktail (In Order, Based On Weight):

Anti-Nausea/Steroid
55ml Anzemet
55ml Dexemethasone

Test Article
358ml SGN-30 Antibody/Placebo (Saline)

GVD Chemo
4ml Vinorlbine
209ml Gemcitabine
265ml Pegylated Liposomal Doxorubicin

Total = 946ml

We ignore the dude for a while but feel bad and start talking. He seems familiar. Being DC, he is compelled by law to ask us what we do. "OH", he says, "you're Danielle from World Watch. I have all the reports and go to all the briefings." I just roll my eyes. Meanwhile, the nurse misses the vein everyone misses. I so hate that vein. Everyone wants to try it. NO MORE. She gets me in the wrist. I listen to Dani and our new friend talk. So happy I get to sit back. She gives him a card and he's gone. Then some Hoosier (Missouri slang) takes his place a couple hours later. We leave the TV on loud. He calls someone regarding his gun warranty. I think he has a Skullete but I don't really want to look at him.

....................BREAK..........................

How does one pee during treatment, you ask? Like everything else, very carefully. Sort of.





Near The end of treatment I ask the nurse if they can give me something for my mouth sore. I'm having trouble eating. After some wrangling ( some asshole wanted me to suffer more apparently) she gets the OK from a RNP on the study team for "magic mouthwash". We thank her profusely. Magic Mouthwash is a catch all. Mine has diphenhydramine and Lidocaine. Yum.

We go to the CVS Pharmacy and pick it up. Insurance won't cover it. assholes. It's $35 for a month(?) supply. Get home, open the box, and there it is: a big bottle of stuff with two tiny powder filled bottles. On the box are instructions:

TO THE PHARMACIST: MIX BEFORE DISPENSING.

What a Fuck. It's not the first time he's been a slack ass motherfucker to us. He's like a disgruntled cashier with a Pharmacy degree. Love CVS (On P st. Next to Whole Foods, the middle eastern pharmacist. ;) ). So Tired of him, I shot off an email to corporate before going back and letting Dani yell at him.

I mix the diphenhydramine and lidocaine in and swirl. Then swig. Hmmmmmm, chalky strawberryish numbing goodness. Drrrrrrooooooooooooooooooooooooooool

I take 5ml/4x/day. I also swish my mouth with baking soda/water every chance I get. I have two Major sores on the right underside of my tongue. After chemo I notice one on the roof of my Mouth. Sunday, there's one on the left of my tongue and both sides of my inner cheeks. It's the tongue sores that suck. I can't stretch my tongue at all. I can't use it to help chewing. Try to conciously not use your tongue while eating. I have to gurgle with liquid after chewing to clear all the food bits out my tongue can no longer help with. It fucking SUCKS!

I can handle the near constant nausea and most of the other symptoms. You might even think everything's peachy when you see me. Mouth sores are hell and I can't feign an Okee Dokee face when they're bothering me.

Sunday, Dani's making dinner. The brandywine tomatoes smell phenomenal. I beg her for a taste. Maybe I'll be OK. I pop a bit into my mouth. Pure succulent heaven. Then I feel it. Like acid on an open wound. I chug ginger ale to neutralize it.

Why'd this have to happen in Summer?

46 comments:

Anonymous said...

[url=http://www.ile-maurice.com/forum/members/wetter-vorhersage.html][b]diesem wetter[/b][/url]

[url=http://www.ile-maurice.com/forum/members/wetter-vorhersage.html][b]twister wetter lyrics[b][/url]

Anonymous said...

[url=http://www.facebook.com/pages/weathercom/298713874092l]www.weather.com[/url]

Anonymous said...

Check Our Muffled Prices at www.Pharmashack.com, The Remarkable [b][url=http://www.pharmashack.com]Online Dispensary [/url][/b] To [url=http://www.pharmashack.com]Buy Viagra[/url] Online ! You Can also Elbow to Unfriendly Deals When You [url=http://www.pharmashack.com/en/item/cialis.html]Buy Cialis[/url] and When You You [url=http://www.pharmashack.com/en/item/levitra.html]Buy Levitra[/url] Online. We Also Company a Superior Generic [url=http://www.pharmashack.com/en/item/phentermine.html]Phentermine[/url] In business of Your Nutriment ! We Send away Maker huge prominence [url=http://www.pharmashack.com/en/item/viagra.html]Viagra[/url] and Also [url=http://www.pharmashack.com/en/item/generic_viagra.html]Generic Viagra[/url] !

Anonymous said...

You could easily be making money online in the undercover world of [URL=http://www.www.blackhatmoneymaker.com]blackhat money[/URL], It's not a big surprise if you haven’t heard of it before. Blackhat marketing uses not-so-popular or misunderstood methods to build an income online.

Anonymous said...

viagra pills cheap viagra men - buy viagra online overnight shipping

Anonymous said...

generic viagra viagra online reviews - generic viagra versus brand viagra

Anonymous said...

viagra online without prescription viagra buy sri lanka - order viagra online paypal

Anonymous said...

viagra online without prescription order viagra online us no prescription - buy viagra online us next day delivery

Anonymous said...

viagra online without prescription buying viagra in us is it legal - buy viagra online cheap with no prescription

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol online can you buy tramadol over the counter in usa - tramadol 50 mg tablets side effects

Anonymous said...

buy somas soma yelp - soma muscle relaxer information

Anonymous said...

buy soma online much do soma cost - does medication soma look like

Anonymous said...

soma medication generic soma 350 mg - ver argento soma online

Anonymous said...

generic soma buy soma online ship florida - soma health club

Anonymous said...

top [url=http://www.c-online-casino.co.uk/]casino bonus[/url] brake the latest [url=http://www.realcazinoz.com/]online casinos[/url] manumitted no set aside hand-out at the best [url=http://www.baywatchcasino.com/]online casinos
[/url].

Anonymous said...

buy soma soma.drugs - soma-online.org

Anonymous said...

buy cialis online cialis daily order - legitimate online pharmacy cialis

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol tramadol 50 mg max dosage - tramadol buy australia

Anonymous said...

buy cialis online buy cialis us pharmacy - buy cialis in us

Anonymous said...

cialis online buy cialis online in usa - buy cialis online in australia

Anonymous said...

generic xanax xanax dosage for cats - generic xanax images

Anonymous said...

generic xanax images of generic xanax - xanax withdrawal neurontin

Anonymous said...

buy xanax bars xanax withdrawal time period - xanax bars m white

Anonymous said...

xanax online xanax high liver enzymes - xanax bars cost street

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol tramadol for dogs + rimadyl - tramadol 50 mg generic

Anonymous said...

xanax cost xanax dosage before flight - xanax effects contraceptive pill

Anonymous said...

carisoprodol 350 mg order carisoprodol online no prescription - carisoprodol soma erowid

Anonymous said...

aev generic fluconazole no prescription - fluconazole online no prescription http://www.diflucanbestprice.net/#fluconazole-online-no-prescription , [url=http://www.diflucanbestprice.net/#diflucan-yeast-infection ]diflucan yeast infection [/url]

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol tramadol 100mg euphoria - can you buy tramadol internet

Anonymous said...

carisoprodol 350 mg carisoprodol 724 - carisoprodol soma wiki

Anonymous said...

carisoprodol 350 mg soma carisoprodol ingredients - carisoprodol found drug test

Anonymous said...

buy cialis online cialis strengths - buy cialis online for cheap

Anonymous said...

buy cialis online buy cialis canadian pharmacy - cialis - tadalafil

Anonymous said...

buy generic cialis online no prescription cialis online legitimate - generic cialis brands

Anonymous said...

http://landvoicelearning.com/#74967 buy tramadol online in usa - tramadol 50mg an 627

Anonymous said...

order tramadol online cod dealing with tramadol addiction - buy tramadol online overnight mastercard

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol online can you buy tramadol online legally - tramadol for dogs is it the same for humans

Anonymous said...

buy tramadol online legal order tramadol online - what is tramadol 100mg used for

Anonymous said...

http://landvoicelearning.com/#44827 tramadol hydrochloride capsules 50mg side effects - tramadol overdose in cats

Anonymous said...

buy clonazepam online is xanax or klonopin better for anxiety - does klonopin 2mg look like

Anonymous said...

carisoprodol 350 mg soma carisoprodol wikipedia - carisoprodol soma watson 350 mg

Anonymous said...

carisoprodol 350 mg side effects soma carisoprodol tablets - what is carisoprodol 350 mg for

Anonymous said...

buy carisoprodol c o d carisoprodol 350 mg generic - carisoprodol dan 5513 side effects

Anonymous said...

buy carisoprodol online without prescription carisoprodol taper - carisoprodol 350 mg blood pressure

Anonymous said...

1, [url=http://www.lunestasleepaid.net/]lunesta mg [/url] - lunesta eszopiclone - lunesta cost http://www.lunestasleepaid.net/.

Anonymous said...

http://www.maps.google.com/ - [url=http://www.wikipedia.org/]wiki[/url]
mail